This post is a guest post by Kayris, a mom to two in Maryland. She writes about raising kids in the big city at The Great Walls of Baltimore. A proud AP mom, she especially uses the principles of Attachment Parenting in the kitchen.

Attachment Parenting is a style of parenting that focuses on creating strong and healthy emotional bonds between child and parent. AP parents believe that using love and respect to guide parenting decisions–from nutrition to discipline to how you teach your child to sleep–forges a strong and secure bond that lasts beyond childhood into adulthood. For more on the eight principles of Attachment Parenting, please visit Attachment Parenting International.

Among the many milestones a baby will reach in his first year, beginning the transition from breast milk or formula to solid food is one of the most fun. What parent doesn’t have a video of a young child sucking in spaghetti one noodle at a time, or a photo of a child wearing (rather than eating) the first birthday cake?

In the wake of the recent childhood obesity epidemic, it’s my opinion that introducing solids to your baby is one of the most important milestones as well. Starting in babyhood, you can stress the importance of respecting your body by practicing good nutrition, and by modeling healthy eating habits, you give your child tools to make healthy food choices as an older child and adult.

Think about all the people in your life and there is bound to be at least one, facing diabetes or another medical crisis, struggling to change a lifetime of bad food habits. It might seem difficult to imagine your baby as an adult, but the attitude you impart to your child NOW will last a lifetime.

As a mom to two, I’ve spent plenty of time wondering if my babies were eating enough, often enough, or a wide enough variety of foods. By making good nutrition and a healthy lifestyle a priority for our family, I now have two children that I consider to be good eaters. Each has their challenges, but here are some of the points that have worked for our AP family.

• Introduce Solids When Your Baby Is Ready–Most doctors will say this happens between four and six months, but let your child lead the way. Don’t let others pressure you into starting solids before your child is ready. My son, now 5 years old, let us know he was ready at 4 months when he would reach for food on our plates. My daughter, now 2, was closer to six months.. She showed no interest before then and it wasn’t until her sleep patterns changed that she was ready.
• Go Slow, And Keep Food Allergies In Mind–If your family has a history of food allergies, ask your pediatrician for specific instructions on when and how to introduce solids. Otherwise, try one new food at a time and wait several days in between new foods so you can be sure there isn’t a problem.
• Make Breast Or Bottle Number One–For the first year, breast milk or formula should supply most of your baby’s calories. Solids are extra. If you are breastfeeding, keep an eye on your supply, as introducing solids can decrease your supply. Read more about maintaining and increasing your supply at Kellymom.com. Personally, I always ended each solid feeding meal with my two children with a short five minute pumping session to keep my milk supply up.
• Never Force A Child To Eat–A baby that is not hungry won’t eat. Try to avoid forcing food on your child, and let his or her natural ability to gauge hunger and satiety develop. This is key to raising an older child that knows when to stop eating! If your baby isn’t interested, put away the food and try again later.
• Have Reasonable Expectations–Some children are better eaters than others. Food preferences are also partially genetic, so don’t be surprised if your baby strongly dislikes something. While some kids need to be offered a food ten times or more before they will accept it, some foods may never be accepted! Think about your own food preferences and you’ll likely find some strong favorites and some strong un-favorites. Neither of my children will eat carrots in any form, no matter how I prepare them; I’ve had to conclude that, for now, it’s a food they don’t like. In addition, pickiness is a natural stage that many children go through. Likes and dislikes will change over the years. Don’t be surprised if your baby happily accepts every food you give him, only to refuse to eat them as a strong willed toddler.
• Respect Your Child’s Individuality–This is especially important if your baby is your second child. Don’t expect or pressure your baby to do things like their older sibling did, or like the child next door. Each child develops at their own pace and in their own way. That goes for eating habits as well.
• Eat As A Family–Get your child used to sitting down with the family to eat at an early age. A study at Columbia University showed that teens who eat dinner with their families six to seven times a week are almost 50 percent more likely to remain substance-free than teens who eat dinner with their families twice a week or less. Teens who eat dinner often with their families are more likely to have better grades, lower stress levels and healthier diets. Family dinners three or more nights per week reduce a child’s likelihood to engage in risky behavior. Start your baby eating with the family now, so it’s an ingrained habit when they are older. In addition, eating as a family is a great way to bond with your children.
• Model Healthy Habits–Long before your baby becomes aware of advertising and is susceptible to tricky marketing aimed at kids, the person with the most influence is YOU. Make sure when your baby sees you eat, it’s wholesome and healthy food. If your diet could use some improvement, this is a great time to do it.

Finally, always remember the AP principle to feed with love and respect.  The healthiest food in the world doesn’t mean as much if the bond between parent and child isn’t there.

Find more information on Attachment Parenting and toddler nutrition here.

Photo source: marekf on Flickr
©2009 Littlestomaks.com

This is a guest post by Annie, Mom of 2, and blogger who writes about the art and science of parenting at the PhD in Parenting blog.

When TwinToddlersDad asked me to write a guest post about attachment parenting and toddler nutrition, I wasn’t sure where to start. There are so many things I could write about. Rather than try to tackle them all, I’m going to give a brief overview of attachment parenting perspective on nutrition and then touch on one key issue in more detail.

Feeding with Love and Respect

Attachment Parenting International (API) has eight principles for attachment parenting. One of them is “Feed with Love and Respect”. At a basic level, this means that:

Feeding a child involves more than providing nutrients; it is an act of love. Whether providing for the very intense hunger needs of a newborn, or serving meals at the family dinner table, parents can use feeding time as an opportunity to strengthen their bonds with their children.

API’s information on feeding with love and respect touches on a number of issues, including:

• Breastfeeding and attachment
• “Bottle Nursing”
• Nurturing through feeding
• Introducing solids
• Nurturing a taste for nutritious food
• Gentle weaning

Dr. Sears, who coined the term “attachment parenting” has said that parents should not feel responsible for their toddlers’ every meal. They do not need to worry about what their children eat or how much they eat. He says that the parents’ job is to buy the right food, prepare it nutritionally, and serve it creatively. The rest is up to the child.

Extended breastfeeding and toddler nutrition

In attachment parenting circles, a lot of babies are breastfed into the toddler years and sometimes beyond. In fact, breastfeeding until the age of 3, 4 or beyond is more common than people think. Breastmilk continues to provide many nutritional and other benefits to nursing toddlers. The problem is that most nutritional guidelines for toddlers are written with an assumption that the child is weaned completely from the breast and formula by 12 months. However, nursing toddlers still get a lot of their nutritional requirements met by breastmilk.

According to FitKids (published by the Heart and Stroke Foundation of Canada), children between 1 and 3 years old require between 1000 and 1200 calories per day on average. Kellymom.com’s information on the average breastmilk intake for toddlers demonstrates that a good portion of those needs can be met with breastmilk:

Several studies have measured breastmilk intake for babies between 12 and 24 months and found typical amounts to be 14-19 oz per day (400-550 mL per day). Studies looking at breastmilk intake between 24 and 36 months have found typical amounts to be 10-12 oz per day (300-360 mL per day).

Since 1oz of breastmilk is equal to about 22 calories, on average 33% of a nursing 12 month to 24 month old’s nutritional requirements are coming from breastmilk and 22% of a 24 to 36 month old’s nutritional requirements are coming from breastmilk. As such, parents that do chose to nurse their children into toddlerhood don’t need to worry if their child is not eating as much food as other children their age.

Weaning, whether child-led or mother-led should be a gradual process, with solid food slowly replacing breastmilk as the main source of nutrition. According to kellymom.com’s excellent information on nutrition for nursing toddlers:

It is normal for baby to keep breastmilk as the primary part of his diet up until 18 months or even longer. An example of a nice gradual increase in solids would be 25% solids at 12 months, 50% solids at 18 months, and 80% solids at 24 months.

Watch your toddler, not the plate. If your toddler is growing well and is in good spirits, don’t worry if he isn’t eating very much as he may still be getting most of what he needs from nursing.

Book recommendations

I hope this post has given you a taste of the attachment parenting approach to toddler nutrition. If you want to read more, if you are concerned that your child isn’t eating enough, or are looking for ideas to make mealtime more fun, then check out these books:

• The Baby Book (by William Sears M.D. and Martha Sears R.N.): Dr. Sears’ Baby Book is an excellent general information book for parenting in the first two years, containing parenting advice, developmental information, and medical information. It has a chapter specifically on “Feeding the Toddler” that has lots of suggestions for getting your toddler to eat and figuring out if your child is eating enough. It also touches on food allergies, choosing the right milk for your toddler, and avoiding pesticides.

• My Child Won’t Eat! (by Carols Gonzalez, M.D.):  Why  you shouldn’t worry too much about what your child is eating or what the growth charts say. This book looks at how eating problems start and how they can be avoided. It also includes many stories from mothers that have tried to get their children to eat and emphasizes Dr. Sears’ assertion that a parent’s only involvement should be providing healthful food choices (not forcing the child to eat).

• Mothering Your Nursing Toddler (by Norma Jane Bumgarner): This book provides great information about the normal course of breastfeeding a toddler, helping moms and dads know what to expect.

• Whining & Dining (by Emma Waverman & Eshun Mott): This is my preferred cook book for little eaters. It includes meals and snacks that the whole family will love and that are nutritious too.

How have you incorporated “feeding with love” into your relationship with your toddler? How do you ensure adequate nutrition while also respecting the fact that it is your child’s body?