Ask the Expert - Daughter Drinks Too Much Milk

Ask The Expert is a weekly column on Littlestomaks.com. The idea is to have a reader-submitted question answered by a nutrition expert or a pediatrician. Feel free to submit your question in the comments section below.

This week, Dr. Dina Rose offers a few handy tips on what to do if your child drinks too much milk.

Dina R. Rose, PhD

PhD Sociology from Duke University
15 years of experience in teaching and research
Expert in feeding habits of kids
Writing a book “It is NOT about nutrition: The Art and Science of Teaching Kids to Eat Right”
Website: It’s Not About Nutrition
Twitter: @DrDrRose
LinkedIn Profile
Contact: via email Dina@DinaRose.net

Question: My toddler refuses to drink anything but milk, and it’s causing her to fill up on milk and not eat as much food. If I take the cup away and only offer it at certain times, she will cry (hysterically) until the next meal time when she gets her cup again. How do I get her to drink less milk and eat more food?

Answer:

Lots of kids get attached to their milk, so you’re not alone, but you’re right to be concerned. Not only can too much milk fill your daughter up and impact her interest in eating, but too much milk can also lead to an iron deficiency. So no matter how you divvy up the milk during the day, give your daughter no more than 16 ounces.

So how do you wean your daughter off the moo? Here are some steps to take:

Identify whether your daughter is attached to the milk or to the cup. It sounds crazy, but some kids really have a thing about their cup. To find out whether the milk or the cup is the source of your struggle put the milk in a different cup and see what your daughter does. If it’s the milk she’s after, your daughter will drink it no matter what. If it’s the cup your daughter loves, expect a meltdown, then rejoice because there’s an easy fix to your problem: put something else in the cup!

Make morning and evening your main milk times. Then during the day either (1) gradually reduce the amount of milk you give your daughter at each meal and snack or (2) slowly dilute the milk with water. Eventually, the daily drink will be only a few sips of milk or mostly water. And that point you can eliminate the daytime milk altogether.

Think of milk time as dessert. Instead of giving your daughter her milk before or during the meal, give it to her at the end as a way of topping her up. Accomplish this shift by telling your daughter that her milk is coming after the meal and then: (1) give her an extremely small meal so she gets to her milk quickly and over time, increase the size of the meal. Or, if she prefers (2) split the mealtime milk into two (unequal) portions and give your daughter the smaller amount before the meal and the larger portion after she’s eaten.

Be very clear with your daughter about when she will have her milk. Since young kids can’t tell time, you need to use events that will help them know when the milk is coming. For instance, tell your daughter she will have milk when she wakes up, after her nap, after she comes back from the playground, or after dinner. That way she won’t think the milk is gone forever.

Prepare your daughter for the change that is coming. Even if you think your child is too young to understand, I recommend that you talk to your daughter about the changes you are making. She’ll get more than you expect and it will help YOU commit to the transition.

Expect a backlash. Recognize that your daughter may not like the new milk arrangement and she’ll probably let you know. Be prepared, but don’t give in to whatever plan you’ve picked. If you make a change and your daughter cries and wins you have only taught her to cry it out some more. So don’t make any changes you aren’t prepared to carry through.

Remember, it’s not so much what you feed, as what you teach that matters. So forget about the milk and focus on the interactions you have with your daughter around the milk. Good luck and let me know how it goes.

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Disclaimer – Information provided in Ask The Expert column on Littlestomaks.com is intended to give you general guidance on a question related to toddler nutrition. It is not meant to be treated as medical advice. You are welcome to contact this expert for a detailed consultation on your specific situation to determine what actions, if any, you should take regarding nutrition and health of your toddlers. We do not recommend you to take any action based solely on the information presented in this column. Experts have agreed to provide their professional opinion on toddler nutrition related questions on a voluntary basis and no compensation is offered to them by Littlestomaks.com.

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