Ask The Expert is a weekly column on The idea is to have a reader-submitted question answered by a nutrition expert or a pediatrician. Feel free to submit your question in the comments section below.

This week, Registered Dietitian Jill Castle explains why it is important to be a good role model for your children and offers tips on how to be a role model for their eating habits and nutrition.



Jill Castle, MS RD LDN
  • B.S Nutrition from Indiana University, Bloomington, IN
  • M.S. Pediatric Nutrition
  • Worked at Mass General Hospital and The Children’s Hospital of Boston
  • Over 20 years of experience in Pediatric Nutrition
  • Website: Pediatric Nutrition of Green Hills
  • Blog: Just the Right Byte
  • Twitter: @pediRD
  • LinkedIn profile
  • Contact: via email

Question: How can I be a good role model for my child?


Does your daughter admire your appearance as you leave for a date night?  Do you hear your son exclaim his aspirations to be just like Tiger Woods or LeBron James?  Does your toddler want to be a teacher or a doctor or a nurse, just like you?

We are all role models to children.  Parents, especially, are under the watchful eye of their child.  How you behave, what you choose, your habits—both good and bad, influence a child every day.  And how you manage your body—what you eat, when and how much you eat, your activity level or lack thereof, all register with children—even toddlers—and can set the foundation for a future of healthy eating and an active lifestyle, or not.

Parents have the unique responsibility of being the primary role model for their child when it comes to food and eating behaviors.  By the time a child is twelve years old, they will model many parental behaviors in this area.  So, if you are a meal skipper, chances are your child may be too.  If you diet off and on, so may your child grow up and do the same.  If you refuse certain foods or eliminate them from your diet, chances are your child may also.  If you spend a lot of time watching television, don’t be surprised if your child comes home and plops in front of the TV, Nintendo DS, or laptop.
It can be overwhelming to realize your child is looking at your behavior every day!  Here are some concepts to keep in mind as you evolve into a terrific role model:

Trust your child to honor their hunger and fullness and eat the right amounts for their body.  Trust your child’s inner intuition about eating.  Trust that you can learn from your child’s natural self-regulation.  This foundation of trust will serve you and your child through the ups and downs of growth, body development, and eating in the future.

Predictability is the key to a happy child.  Set up a framework for meals and snacks—time them at regular intervals to avoid over-hunger.  Structure your meals to have most of the food groups represented, most of the time.  Offering fruit at every meal is a great way to ensure healthy eating and build predictability in mealtimes.  Predictability builds security—food security.  A child who is secure with food and eating tends to have fewer problems with weight and eating later in life.

Choose food for health.  Focus on foods that are rich in nutrients, fiber, and taste.  Choose more whole, natural foods such as fruits, vegetables, lean meats, low-fat dairy products, and whole grains.  Consider processed foods, food colorings and dyes, caffeine, and sugar substitutes as the “occasional food”, rather than a staple in your family’s diet.  If the drive through is a common stop on your way home, envision another way to bring convenience and efficiency to your eating—try a crock-pot,  a pressure cooker, or homemade frozen entrees instead.

Expose  your child to a variety of foods.  Ensure that new foods accompany familiar foods.  Try ethnic varieties, exotic fruits, seasonal vegetables, and flavorful condiments.  Try different forms of familiar foods—instead of French fries, try roasted potatoes.    Instead of applesauce, try baked apples.  Don’t rule out a food because you think your child won’t like it—and don’t paint a grim face if you do offer it—stay neutral and trust your child to let you know their impression.

Adventure in eating is fun for kids.  Kids love to help their parents in the meal preparation process—it is an adventure for a child to tear the lettuce, peel the carrots, and wash the cucumbers for a salad.  Show your sense of eating adventure by having a “new menu item” night during the week.  An openness to “try anything” also shows adventure in eating—let your child see the adventurous eater in you!

Move your body—daily.  If you want your child to be active, you need to be active too.  Show your enjoyment and enthusiasm for exercise!

Share your food.  This is a safe way for your child to try new food items and a way to build trust and security with food and eating.  And food always tastes better off of Daddy’s plate!  Sharing food sends the very basic and important message of generosity.

Communicate early and often with your child about food, eating, nutrients, health, and physical activity.  Promoting open and honest communication about nutrition will set a foundation of trust, health education, and realism in the world of food and eating.  Remember, children are curious and will ask the questions—let them know early on that you are their resource for reliable information.

Manners are important and beginning early with the basic “please and thank you” is a great place to start.  Make sure you “please” and “thank” your child early on—and you will be pleasantly surprised when you hear it stated, unsolicited from their mouths.  Practice common table manners—it pays off before you know it.

Role Modeling is not a choice for a parent—it comes with the territory.  Choosing to be a great role model with food and eating will reap lifetime rewards in your child’s food choices, eating behaviors, exercise patterns, and overall health.  Remember, your child is watching your every move.  Your moves don’t have to be perfect—just thoughtful and intended to a healthful and active child.

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Disclaimer – Information provided in Ask The Expert column on is intended to give you general guidance on a question related to toddler nutrition. It is not meant to be treated as medical advice. You are welcome to contact this expert for a detailed consultation on your specific situation to determine what actions, if any, you should take regarding nutrition and health of your toddlers. We do not recommend you to take any action based solely on the information presented in this column. Experts have agreed to provide their professional opinion on toddler nutrition related questions on a voluntary basis and no compensation is offered to them by


  1. Great post!

    “When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts … A mother has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.” ~Sophia Loren

    Applies to dads too.

  2. Great post!

    “When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts … A mother has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.” ~Sophia Loren

    Applies to dads too.

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